Tuesday, November 2, 2010

What is our world coming to?!

I live in one of those small towns where "nothing bad ever happens" so when something bad DOES happen, it leaves a lasting affect on the entire community. Last Friday, we experienced a murder-suicide that pretty much rocked our little town. A husband walked into the home he once shared with his estranged wife, shot and killed her and then turned the gun on himself. To hear that made me deeply sad. One of those sadnesses where you can't find words to speak. A tragedy you cannot even imagine. The couple had 3 children and the Mom ran an in-home daycare, a daycare that had 7 children under the age of 6 there at the time, including their own 4 year old son when this terrible thing happened.

The first thing I thought about was my own children. How awful would it be for them to be picked up from school by family members and told that they no longer have a mother or a father. 3 children who were innocent victims caught in a tangled web of domestic problems. 3 children who will now grow up being raised by grandparents, aunts, uncles. A daughter who will not have a dad to walk her down the aisle. Sons who will never get to toss a football again with their Dad. A daughter who won't get to go shopping with her Mom for her first prom dress. I thought about how many times a day I call my Mom and think that the little girl who is the same age as my little girl won't ever get that chance. And it breaks my heart. It breaks my heart into a million pieces because it was a needless act of violence. It was cowardness. I wonder what kind of lasting issues it will leave with those 7 children under the age of 6 who were there that day. Who heard the gunshots ring out. Who saw those bodies. Who huddled themselves together and went to seek help from the neighbor because they knew something really bad had happened. I have read countless articles about it online Here and Here and it doesn't seem possible that this happened here in our safe little town that we have lived in our entire lives. Where my kids go to school.

Initial reports from police made it sound like the kids were all outside, heard the gunshots and went to the neighbors. Now I am hearing and reading that the kids were inside the home and saw the aftermath of the killings that took place. Regardless of what happened, those children will be forever affected.

April Vann's friends and family members will join tonight at her funeral to say goodbye. Her 3 children will have to say goodbye to their Mommy. Parents will say goodbye to a daughter. A sister will say goodbye to her best friend. And as angry as it makes me at this man, a family also lost their Dad, son, brother. While April and her children were surely the victims here, Eric Vann also has a family who is suffering right now as they look for answers. Answers to why or how this could have happened.

I was reading a profile of the Mom online...I read where she wrote that she married her high school sweetheart. And I wonder if she ever even thought in her mind that he was capable of such things. Does anyone ever really think their loved one is capable of murder?!

Life is so short. And it can be taken in an instant I wish this was the only case I knew of where something like this has happened but it is one of many. Some I knew personally, some I didn't know at all yet I was affected by each one as were so many others.

Say a prayer for these families today. I cannot even fathom the pain or the hurt that they must be feeling. I just hope their hearts can start to heal and their lives can somehow be pieced back together. God bless those children. And if you are in a similar, volatile domestic situation...get out. Find help. Protect yourself and your family. Don't ever think "This can't happen to me."

8 comments:

  1. This made me emotional. I too live in a smaller town, but the difference is that my town has the highest murder rate per capita. It doesn't shake you any less when something like this happens. The beginning of last year, someone walked into a bar and shot the bartender, leaving a 12 year old girl with no parents since her mother left them years before. Two kids (KIDS!) shot and murdered another 19 year old boy for flirting with one of their girlfriends. One woman disappeared and was later found on buried on her ex-boyfriends property next to a dead horse.
    I remember all of this because it doesn't shake you any less when it happens more often. There's a part of the bike trail through town that I can't walk down at all because of what happened there. A couple of nuns were walking through town on the bike trail at night and blessing the city, two men raped and killed them right there. I'm sorry this is a comment filled with such horrors but these are things that are stuck in my mind forever, things that I can't forget no matter how hard I tried. I have no idea how this will stick out in these children's minds, but I wish them the best. My prayers are going out for everyone here, it is such a tragic thing.

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  2. I just got the news yesterday about a former student of mine who took his own life. It was probably the hardest news I have ever received. No reason for his decision was given, but it doesn't really matter now. I imagine he is feeling pretty bad right now watching the grief and sorrow he has caused. I would have done anything to help him, if only he had called someone... Life is full of terrible tragedies. Let's hope we learn from them and prevent the tragedies we can.

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  3. i completely understand your thoughts. i run an in-home daycare and one day, just last month, one of my little boys didn't show up. no call, nothing, until two days later when his mother called to tell me that the father had taken his life...with the little boy at home. he's only 17 months old, but that little boy will not have his daddy to look up to. he isn't old enough to remember what pride he was in his daddy's eyes. there is no reason anyone has for what he did and nobody saw it coming. i, to this day, still think to myself, what could be that bad? although something like this hasn't impacted my life often, once or twice is enough and i still can not understand why!

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  4. Awful! Let me know if you will be putting together gifts for the kids! I would like to help

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  5. Those poor kids! I feel for them! I want to take them into my home and comfort them.

    I got emotional earlier this week when I saw this:

    http://www.wsaz.com/news/headlines/needs_checked6-Year-Old_Weighs_18_Pounds_Mother_and_Guardian_Charged_with_Child_Neglect_105880448.html

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  6. Wow, that is really terrible and so very sad.

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  7. Great post Sarah - although the story is horrible, absolutely horrible - you putting this on here can help those who are in domestic violence situations, I love that you added that at that blurb on the end.

    Those poor children will have to live with this event for the rest of their lives. I am finding it hard putting myself in this man's shoes when his actions affected so many, his and her families, their children, and all children at the daycare - in addition to completely rocking the town of Celina. I know people experience depression and moments of weakness, but I still am unable to see his reasoning.

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  8. That's so crazy. I hope those children find some peace.

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